Wishing you were somehow here again* - Emmy Rossum

Today's would have been my father's 84th birthday. If he was still alive. It has been more than 8 years since he was taken away from this earth.

Flowers for papa

I can't say that i miss him a lot - not all the time. But sometimes, i do. Especially on days like today.

Sometimes, there will be small little things that remind me of him - like how each time i hear about the football team Bordeaux, i am reminded of the time when we were watching the sports news on TV when they announced that Bordeaux football team trashed another team and he commented "How can a team with the name 'Bodoh' (stupid in the Malay language) win like that?"

Quite lame-eh? No prizes for guessing where i got my "lame-ness" from!!!

As i grow older, i really can see that i am in fact my father's son. Looks wise no but our outlook, our attitude towards people and things are quite the same. What differs us is the fact that i became a Christian at a very young age and that changed a lot of how i see and deal with things.

As a father now, i understand him better - and have a new sense of appreciation of the struggles he had to go through - that only a father would know and understand.

I wish he was still around as there are so many things to chat about. I wish he was still around today as he would be so happy to have Shona as his granddaughter - and she would absolutely love him as her yeh yeh (paternal grandfather).

But he is not.

Yet, as i'm blogging this, i realise that he is!!! Just as i was mentioning above - he is "in me". I am who I am because of him - a big part anyway.

*This was the version from the movie adaptation of the musical, Phantom of the Opera.

Time's up* - Ashley Tisdale

Bye bye Brendan. It's nothing personal. You've been a great guy but the time is right for you to go.

It has come to a point when it doesn't matter if i watch Liverpool play anymore. Even if i have the choice, i may choose not to. As to watch them play these days can be a much painful experience.

We stood by you from the start, hoping that you are the breath of fresh air we need.

We waited as you were given money and brought in new players. But for every Sturridge and Couthinho, there were the Lambert and Lovren. Thankfully, you managed to get Ings and Milner in for free before this season started.

But we still do not look like that is to be taken seriously. Sure, we almost won the league 2 years ago - but that was because Suarez made the whole team - including you - look good.

Your role which you played was making sure Suarez did not leave for Arsenal after 2012 season. You should have tried harder to keep him because without Suarez, we got to see Liverpool for what they really are. Let me quote Jamie Carragher:- "Liverpool are becoming Tottenham. They think they are a big club but the real big clubs aren't concerned about what they do"

So in a way, it was a good thing we did not win the EPL that year for we would all be duped in thinking that you are the answer to our prayers for a manager to bring us back to the heights we used to scale.

No doubt you are good - but just there yet. And so that is what Liverpool is now too.

We have given you time, money and our support. And now your time is up. Thanks for everything! Good bye.

* Only found as a bonus track on her Guilty Pleasures album (iTunes stores), written by Katy Perry.

Wake me up when September ends* - Green Day

It's October!!!!!! First of October! WAKE UP!!!!!!!!!!

No, I've not been sleeping all this time - but i need to wake up from my blogging slumber! It's been more than 1 month since my last post. Not a single one in September!

No, September was not uneventful! But i just could not find the time - to actually post something that i can deem worthy to be on this blog, not a slipshod post which is up just for the sake of posting something (although this post feels like such a post...)

I even have so many posts in my draft folders as i did not want to post more than once a day in August.

Is life just too busy that blogging is out of the question? if i find it difficult now, how will it be when no. 2 comes?

Yes, no. 2 is on her way.

Yes, *her* way.

More about that another time...

*This song was written by their frontman, Billie Joe, regarding the death of his father.

Uninvited* - Alanis Morissette

Last Wednesday, there was an uninvited guest who came into our house!

It was a good thing that i decided to go to our TV room in the morning with my daughter - for it is better that i discovered the "guest" than my wife!!!

When we got there, i noticed that something was not right as things from my cork board was falling off (it was my "This is Anfield" banner so i guess that little fella must have been a Red Devil fan!!!). I noticed also that my study lamp had fallen over and when i switched on the lights, i saw IT!!! I quickly grabbed my little girl, slammed the door shut and ran down!

When my wife saw us, she must have noticed how white my face was - i told her that something is upstairs and her first thought was that it was a cockroach!!!

Well, we started calling up exterminators and pest controllers to sort out the guest. To our dismay, they all had the same modus operandi - set up a trap and then hopefully it will catch that fella within 2 days!!!!

Finally, i found this company online and they said that they will go in and catch that fella for us! And they can come by noon (one company said they'll only come after 3 pm that day).

It was a little amusing as the guy over the phone tried to tell me that they will basically kill the intruder and it may be in a violent manner. Perhaps he didn't want to offend any animal rights activists!!! I told him that we are fine with it. Just get it OUT!!!

And they did. They sent one man over. He was polite - although a little amused that i was clearly scared of the small fella. Well, small relatively - if compared to me. But to me, it was a big fella!!! The guy tried to make me feel better by saying that different people are afraid of different things. But he asked if i was afraid of cockroaches and i said yes, i was afraid of that too!!!

He went up and locked himself in the room. I heard him used a stick to try to get it out of its hiding place. After a couple of minutes, my heart sank - had it left edi? That would mean we still have to pay them their fees! But then i heard the fella screaming!

What the man did was just to place some glue boards - it's like fly paper but bigger. He then chased the fella onto it and it will get caught.

Well done! Here's a free plug for them:-

The hardest part then was to clean up the entire room. First things first, though. I made sure that there are no openings available for such intruders again. These fellas can squeeze in through some really small openings!

And if you wanna have a look at that fella, you can click on the following picture to enlarge it.

*Her first single after her successful Jagged Little Pill album - this song was featured first in teh soundtrack of City of Angels.

I will always love you* - Whitney Houston

I felt sad today when i realised that i cannot afford to bring my daughter to a concert that she would love! For a brief moment, i felt like i have failed her.

And then i began to think of the things i know that i will not be able to afford to give her, the places that i can never bring her to, the experiences that i cannot ensure she gets. Have i failed her?

Of course there are people who say that if we give our children everything they want, we will be doing a disservice to them. Still, it does not change the fact that i won't be able to see the joy in her face if i could bring her to that concert.

But at the end of the day, i am just focusing on myself - i am being selfish!!! I am thinking of what would make me feel good. My daughter did not ask to go for the concert - she is just happy to watch the studio recorded performance in our TV room. In fact, saying she is happy is an understatement. She absolutely loves it. She was dancing around today much to my amusement. There will be days when she insists that i dance along with her and she is left in stitches seeing me try!

Similarly with going to exotic places and eating at posh restaurants - to her, it does not matter as long as she is with us. As a friend said, other people go to Club Med, he goes to PD (Port Dickson).

When i think back of my childhood, my parents also couldn't give me a lot of things that i wanted. I would also hear of friends who went to Disneyland for holidays. But it was ok with me. Well, not really ok - but i learnt to accept it. And i was never bitter nor angry at my parents or the financial situation we were in. I just hope that my children will have the same mindset.

A lot of people today do not have more than 1 child because they feel that they cannot afford it. They will not be able to buy nor provide the children will all the things they want. But i disagree with such a view - and i have friends who are not well to do but have a lot of children. And they are doing fine.

I am reminded today that i may not be able to provide materially for my children - but what i can provide, i should give as much as i can for as long as i am able to. And one thing that i should do is to love them. Love my girl. She doesn't ask for much. she just wants her daddy and she wants her daddy to spend time with her.

Love does not mean giving her everything she wants. Love is to give of myself to her no matter what. And i pray that i will be able to love her always.

*Her remake of the Dolly Parton song which was featured in the soundtrack of the movie, The Bodyguard.

Renewed* - Stryper

I just renewed my passport this week - will be travelling for work later this year (meaning it is paid for - can't afford any overseas holidays).

I want online to get more info about renewing my Malaysian passport but could not get the info I wanted. So as a public service post, I am going to provide info which I wanted but could not get.

Let me just put s disclaimer here - the info is correct as of the 18th of August 2015. Further, the renewal was done at the office at Plaza Glomac and I am unsure if other places have different practices or not.

First things first - what you need to bring. Bring your Mykad and RM200 (as fees for adults). And your current passport. That's all. You Amy want to bring something to amuse you while you wait. A book kept me suitably entertained.

From online, I found out the office opens at 7.30 am. I was late - close to 8 am and there was a long queue. You can park behind the office - an open air car park for RM2 an hour.

When you are allowed in, you will be given a small piece of paper. You are required to fill in your name, your address, your height, your mobile number and your email address. There is a small counter there with pens if you need them. You will have to submit that form together with your Mykad and you'll be given a number. I was the 46th person.

After waiting for over an hour, my number was called. I was required to submit everything and they took my fingerprint. They also took my photo - coats are provided. So you do not need to bring your own photos. Can save some money on that.

After that, I had to wait until they called my number again to the payment counter. I paid the RM200 and they gave me a printed receipt together with another number on the receipt.

I then had to wait again for a while before they called for the number on my receipt. They collected the receipt and then I had to wait until they called for me by name.

That's it. I was done in less than 3 hours.

Quite happy with the process. Not happy with my photo which I'm stuck with for the the next 5 years. I was told from online that I should have a neutral expression - but I overcompensated and I looked really miserable! Lol!

*The last track from this Christian metal group's 7th studio album, No More Hell To Pay.

Stuck on you* - Lionel Ritchie

It has been a while since I've posted anything up. Well, compared to the flurry of posts after my surgery!

The reason is simple - I've finally moved back into my own house. It's been a week since that day when I came back home.

I wondered before my surgery how my daughter'so reaction will be. Is it going to be "absence makes the heart grow fonder" or "out of sight, out of mind". A part of me which feared that I may not make it through the surgery hoped it would have been the latter. After all, she is just barely over 2 years old. How much can she remembe? I cannot remember anything about what happened to me when I was two.

But thankfully, it was the former rather than latter. And although it has been a bit difficult, I have to admit it feels good to be missed and wanted, doesn't it?

It meant that she wanted me by her side ALL the time! And I'm not exaggerating. Even though she had been warned that I am not allowed to carry her and that I will only be holding her hand, she made sure that she held on to my finger almost all the time!

So I have to make sure that I get my rest whenever she is sleeping - for she will not allow me any sleep when she is awake! She will make sure that I am stuck to her by her side all the time!

Ok. Better go get some rest now!

*Interestingly, this hit song of his marked his country music debut!

Join together* - The Who

I went back to remove the staples last Thursday. Managed to sneak a selfie while waiting for the doctor to come.

Unlike other kinds of surgery where they use stitches which actually dissolve in the end, they literally stapled my scalp back together!!! On Thursday, the doctor just removed the staples as one would from a stapled bunch of papers!!!! Thankfully, he didn't use a stapler!!!

If you don't believe me, you may click on the following photo (which i shrink it into quite small in case some people do not like seeing these kinda stuffs) for a zoom in on the staples in my head!

*This song was released as a non-album single way back in the early seventies.

I'll be there for you* - The Pretenders

I lift up my eyes to the mountains— 
where does my help come from? 
My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. 
He will not let your foot slip— 
he who watches over you will not slumber; 
indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. 
The Lord watches over you— 
the Lord is your shade at your right hand; 
the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. 
The Lord will keep you from all harm— 
he will watch over your life; 
the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.

The passage above is taken from the Bible - Psalm 121 to be precise. I read this Psalm some weeks before my surgery and it was of great comfort to me. It was not coincidence during the church leaders' meeting when the elders decided to pray for my surgery, Mr. Wong read this very same Psalm before praying for me.

The Psalm is such a timely reminder that God will be there for me. I can truly count on him - and be comforted as the one I am counting on is the one who is powerful - the creator of the universe, no less.

You can read more about my views on this Psalm here.

*The theme song for the popular TV series, Friends.

No matter what* - Boyzone

There was an interesting quote from one of the characters in Dear Galileo:-

Interesting? "People these days are just concerned about the result, not the process".

The line was spoken in the context of fishing - one of the characters was fishing and another felt that it was a waste of time as they could very well buy the fish.

It is true! And it is sad. I remember over 20 years ago where some colleges used to advertise how students can finish their pre-U very quickly and graduate young. The focus is on the results, not the process.

In football, we see that a lot too - who cares about playing the "beautiful game"? If they play attractive football, that is the icing on the cake. But what matters is that the team wins - or get the result they desire - which sometimes means a draw. And they play what pundits call "ugly football". And they don't care about the criticism - they are paid to get the result, no matter how the result is achieved.

We live in a day where the ends justifies the means. But does it?

I feel strongly about this because it is the process that determines the quality of the result. Perhaps i am looking at it in the field of education which i am in - results does not guarantee success in the working world. It all depends on how the process of obtaining the results - the trials and tribulations, the challenges, the lessons learnt.

I find personally that the process of obtaining the results in my education played a big part into molding me into who i am today. It also helped me appreciate life - and to live life to the fullest.

*This song is their remake of a song taken from the musical Whistle Down The Wind written by Andrew Lloyd Webber.