How to talk to your daughter about her body, step one: Don't talk to your daughter about her body, except to teach her how it works.
Don't say anything if she's lost weight. Don't say anything if she's gained weight.
If you think your daughter's body looks amazing, don't say that.
Here are some things you can say instead: "You look so healthy!" is a great one. Or how about, "You're looking so strong." "I can see how happy you are -- you're glowing."
Better yet, compliment her on something that has nothing to do with her body.
Don't comment on other women's bodies either. Nope. Not a single comment, not a nice one or a mean one.
Teach her about kindness towards others, but also kindness towards yourself.
Don't you dare talk about how much you hate your body in front of your daughter, or talk about your new diet. In fact, don't go on a diet in front of your daughter. Buy healthy food. Cook healthy meals. But don't say, "I'm not eating carbs right now." Your daughter should never think that carbs are evil, because shame over what you eat only leads to shame about yourself.
Encourage your daughter to run because it makes her feel less stressed. Encourage your daughter to climb mountains because there is nowhere better to explore your spirituality than the peak of the universe. Encourage your daughter to surf, or rock climb, or mountain bike because it scares her and that's a good thing sometimes.
Help your daughter love soccer or rowing or hockey because sports make her a better leader and a more confident woman. Explain that no matter how old you get, you'll never stop needing good teamwork. Never make her play a sport she isn't absolutely in love with.
Prove to your daughter that women don't need men to move their furniture.
Teach your daughter how to cook kale. Teach your daughter how to bake chocolate cake made with six sticks of butter. Pass on your own mom's recipe for Christmas morning coffee cake.
Pass on your love of being outside. Maybe you and your daughter both have thick thighs or wide ribcages. It's easy to hate these non-size zero body parts. Don't. Tell your daughter that with her legs she can run a marathon if she wants to, and her ribcage is nothing but a carrying case for strong lungs. She can scream and she can sing and she can lift up the world, if she wants.
Remind your daughter that the best thing she can do with her body is to use it to mobilize her beautiful soul.
~ Sarah Koppelkam
I absolutely hate it when some people say to my daughter, 'Look at your tummy!!!! You are soooo fat!!!!!' If a girl is obese, you can tell her to take care of her health. If not, then just keep your views to yourself.
When I was overseas recently and was channel surfing, I saw this ad about a product which will help the (woman) wearer enhance her cleavage. It starts of with her feeling really sad and miserable as she has a colleague at work with a nice cleavage - and it ends of with her being so happy because now she can have a nice cleavage too!!!!! I felt so sad that these advertisers try to promote the idea that your life can only be complete if you look or are shaped in a particular manner - and if you are not, then you should feel miserable.
I think it is important in this day and age to emphasize the important of being beautiful inside and not to be so shallow and only be in 'love' with the shape of a person.
I am so surprised that so many people actually like the song that is the title of this post. To me, it is a song which objectifies women - which is why it is so surprising to me that people like it. It is a song that demonstrate how shallow the song-writer is. I hope my daughter will never end up with a person like that, who is only infatuated by her external looks - but that she will find someone who loves her for who she is, and for the wonderful person she is.
*Everyone probably knows - and loves (except me) this song now.
No comments:
Post a Comment